Mothering Made Easier

Will the Snow Days Every Stop?

2011-01-28T07:44:00.003-08:00

With most of the country still under snow and schools being called off everywhere, we thought we'd give you an activity to keep everyone busy...and happy... this afternoon.

When we're cooped up, we love to do something out of the ordinary to make the snow day special. Even though it's not the time of year to color eggs and even if you don't celebrate Easter, this is a fun activity you can do to brighten up the boredom blues.

Colored Eggs

Materials

Coffee mugs or bowls, one for each color (We like styrofoam bowls for easy clean up.)

Water

White vinegar

Hardboiled eggs

Spoons

Measuring cup

Measuring spoon

Empty paper towel roll, if you have one

Newspapers

Crayons, rubber bands, stickers permanent markers, embellishments, glue (Optional)

Lay out the newspaper and place the bowls on top.
Fill each bowl with 2/3 cup of water, 1 teaspoon vinegar, and food coloring until you've achieved the color you want.
Cut the paper towel roll into 1" circles. Set the eggs in these to dry.
Place the eggs in the bowls and use the spoons to turn the egg. If you want, draw on the eggs with crayon, wrap with rubber bands or put stickers on the egg before dyeing them. Remove the rubber bands or stickers when the egg is dry.
After coloring the eggs, add other embellishments if desired.

Make deviled egg sailboats for lunch.

Peel the eggs and cut in half.
Scoop out the egg yolk and mix with mayo, mustard, relish, or any ingredients you use to make deviled eggs.
Cut a thin slice of egg white off the bottom so the "boats" will sit flat.
Put the yolk mixture back into the egg whites.
Cut a small triangle out of American cheese or peppers and weave it onto a toothpick for the sail. Stick the toothpick into the deviled egg.

Will the Snow Days Every Stop?

2011-01-28T07:44:00.001-08:00

A Great Homemade Gift for Kids

2010-12-17T12:30:00.001-08:00

I always love to give a gift to children that doesn't require batteries, provides opportunities for parents to spend with their children in addition to allowing kids time to be creative. This holiday I decided to make a boredom box for some of our smaller relatives that will provide days of fun.

I purchased a plastic storage box from Wal Mart that could hold all of the materials. Included in the box was: play dough, Oobleck, shaving cream art, drawing dough, slime, white mud, and weaving. All of the materials, except the small paints and shaving cream, were dry ingredients that would require a little help from a parent. The directions for each activity was listed on the sticker. I know the box was a hit with my kids because they asked me to make them one.

to reproduce this gift, visit our website, click here, on Monday. We will have the stickers and directions available for downloading

For birthdays, the holidays or any other time, a boredom box is the perfect gift.

Painting on an Unusual Canvas

2010-12-16T15:33:00.000-08:00

Our Christmas countdown continues and today Peyton will demonstrate how to create a painted scene on a window.

Find a Little Time for Snuggling This Season

2010-12-09T10:42:00.000-08:00

I love reading with my kids, especially in the winter. We cozy up on the couch or in bed with blankets, snuggle close together and share a story. This time of year, many of our book selections are about the holidays. It gives us the opportunity to share our thoughts, traditions and meaning of Christmas.

Below are a list books recommended by Alison Mc Donald at No Time For Flashcards. Her recommendations are always fantastic and sure to be a hit with your kids. Check out her creative crafts, too.

Bring out the blanket, make a cup of hot cocoa and enjoy a holiday book with your special little child before the holidays slip away.

The Twelve Days of Christmas by Jan Brett

It’s Christmas by Tina Burke

Ho, Ho, Ho, Tucker! by Leslie McGuirk

Albert’s Christmas by Leslie Tryon

It's Snowing!

2010-12-09T10:32:00.001-08:00

I went to a friend's house yesterday and thought I had walked into a snowstorm! She had watched our video on how to make simple snowflakes and decided to make them with her seven year old daughter. My friend told me that she had made these as a child and had forgotten all about the craft. Now her seven year old can't get enough of them. Their entry way and living room ceilings are filled with snowflakes and there are strips of tape nearby waiting to hang more. Thanks for sharing this, Lisa!

Simple Paper Snowflakes

2010-11-30T18:05:00.000-08:00

Add a Soldier to Your Holiday Card List

2010-11-29T08:11:00.000-08:00

The holidays are such a busy time that we sometimes forget that there are many men and women serving our country in less than festive environments. They are far from their families and often enjoy the holiday season through their memories of traditions celebrated in years gone by. Your family can share your holiday spirit with a service person thousands of miles away by writing a simple letter. It only takes your thoughts and a 44 cent stamp.

Servicemen and women are stationed around the world in combat and non-combat situations and they all enjoy being remembered. There are two sites I like to use when my children write to service personnel. The first is through the USO (www.action.uso.org/action/sem-thank-you?sc=OM-gadw-p_Support-search_ThankyouLetter). This site allows you to simply send a general email to a service person, thanking them for their efforts.

If you would like to write a more personal letter or send a care package, using Any Soldier (www.anysoldier.com), is a great site to use. This is a non profit website and does ask for donations however, they are not required. Any Soldier allows you to select a military branch as well as request an address for a soldier serving around the world. The site offers a multitude of information about contacting soldiers and will answer any questions you may have. To send a holiday message, you will want to start this project right away because the mail can take a while to reach the service person.

Soldiers sometimes reply to letters they receive, depending upon where they are stationed. The children at our church sent letters and received handwritten replies from some soldiers they contacted. One soldier who responded was a mother, serving in Iraq, thousands of miles from her children. The children were thrilled to receive a reply, especially from Iraq, but, it was the mothers in the group who were moved to tears of gratitude for her sacrifice of service.

It doesn't take much to write a note of thanks to a brave soldier who voluntarily enlists in our country's military. We are blessed by their service which allows us the freedoms we enjoy this holiday season and everyday.

Send Your Letter to Santa

2010-11-20T18:33:00.000-08:00

Now that you've decorated your stationery, it's time to write your letter to Santa. Your toddlers can dictate their letter to you. Your preschooler and early elementary kids may want to give it a try on their own, but be sure to "translate" it when they aren't watching. Let your older kids write their letter on their own; you'll be surprised by what they say.

Here are some great websites to receive replies from Santa...

Email Santa This is a free site that allows kids to email Santa and receive an immediate reply. There are also some additional fun activities that your child can customize for him/herself.

Free Letters From Santa This free site allows you to customize a letter for your child then print it or have it emailed. the letters are cute and simple.

Santa Claus House This is the original Santa letter begun in 1952. Santa's reply comes in the mail, is postmarked North Pole, Alaska and has other trinkets from Santa for a small fee . There are several ways to customize your child's letter on the site. Your letter needs to be sent by December 10th to receive a reply in time for Christmas.

Letters by Santa This is another site that offers a Santa reply and for a short time, includes Santa phone calls.You can include information that will customize the letter for your child.

You can always write your own letter from Santa or have a friend do it for you so your kids don't recognize your writing. These sites can give you cute ideas to include in your notes. Make sure that if you "send" letter to Santa that you keep the original. As a mom with older children it's always fun to look at their letters from years past.

Enjoy keeping the magic of the season alive by corresponding with Santa.

Stationery for Santa

2010-11-19T11:12:00.000-08:00

In our house if you don't believe, you don't receive. So if you are 3 or 30, this "Santa" needs a wish list ASAP which is why it is the first activity in our stocking on the countdown tree.

To start, we gather some art supplies we have around the house and sit down together for a 30 minute creative session to make stationery for Santa's letter. There is only one way to make the stationery and that's your child's way. You can give them a few ideas, but they will most likely know exactly what they want to do. Making your own stationery with them will also give them ideas without telling them what to do.

If your child is too little to create a letter for Santa, a hand or foot print is always a wonderful reminder of the holidays. Gather a sponge, paint, tap, heavy piece of cardboard, paper, paper plate, and baby wipes. Tape the paper on the cardboard and squeeze some paint on the paper plate. It's easiest to make the print while your little one is in their car seat as it is a familiar place. Sponge paint their hand or foot and place it on the paper. Wipe their hand or foot with the baby wipes.

The toddler or preschooler just like to stick stuff on

things. Lay out several cut up pieces of construction paper, wrapping paper, holiday stickers, stamps and stamp pads. Give them a piece of paper and glue stick and let them go for it. You can write on the back or make it a folded card.

Want something a little more challenging? Draw a box in the center of the paper leaving a border that your child can decorate with crayons,markers, stickers, stamps, glitter, etc. If your little artist gets overly creative and decorates inside the box, don't worry. Write on the back or glue another piece of paper in the center of the paper.

Up for a little bigger challenge for your older kids? Honestly, it's not that hard so you may want to keep reading. Try some stencil sponge painting. Use a file folder or index card and cut out a simple stencil like those in the picture.

Tape the pencil on a piece of paper. Use a small piece of a moist kitchen sponge and dip it lightly in paint then dab it inside the stencil. Remove the stencil and let dry. Your child can decorate the painting with stickers, paper, ribbons, markers, glitter and much more.

Your child may only take 5 minutes or 1 hour to create their stationery. When the decorating is done, be sure to write the date on the card and set it aside until you're ready to write the note to Santa.

Have fun with this project!

Creating Family Traditions

2010-11-18T08:00:00.000-08:00

I love the holidays! You can stop grumbling at me now because it's not the shopping, decorating, cooking, cards and everything that goes along with the holidays that I love. My favorite part of the holidays are our family traditions and how my children talk about them.

Even though we've lived in many different states, our traditions have stayed the same and the kids talk about them with a fondness in anticipation of the holidays. To me, this is the most heartwarming part of the holidays because there are many holiday traditions from my

childhood that I will always treasure. I remember how my mother always decorated the tree,

the homemade pajamas and a book we received every year, Christmas Eve with 60 of my relatives, dinner with my grandparents whom I loved dearly and many more. What I don't remember are the gifts that I thought were so important at the time but now, are meaningless.

If your children are young or old, you can always create family memories. Over the next several weeks, I will be sharing several ideas you may want to add to your holiday celebration. Please share your ideas so we can learn from each other.

Our kitchen is decorated as a kid-friendly space and our advent tree is the highlight for the kids. We have a small artificial tree that the children decorate with old Mardi Gras beads, lights, small stockings and homemade ornaments.

At the beginning of the season we hang 24 stockings on the tree. In each stocking is an activity for holidays. Each idea gives children a simple fun activity to do with you or for someone else.

The stockings are simple pieces of felt glued or sewn together. You can embellish them anyway you would like or not at all. Each stocking is labeled from 1-24.

On December 1st, the first stocking is "opened" to discover the holiday activity for the day. The stocking is replaced by a simple, kid-friendly ornament the kids have made or been given.

The following are some ideas that I include in the stockings.

1. Decorate stationery to write your letter to Santa

2. Write your letter to Santa

3. Bring cookies to a fire station and thank the firemen and women for all they do.

4. Paint a winter snow scene on a window in your house.

5. Make snowflakes.

6. Write a letter to a soldier overseas.

7. Bring a neighbor some cookies.

8. Make a Christmas ornament.

9. Read a story about Christmas.

10. Tell someone about your favorite holiday tradition.

11. Make a present for your mom.

12. Sell hot chocolate and donate the money to a cause.

13. Make a present for your dad.

14. Be extra helpful to your teacher or friend.

15. Make a present for a sibling.

16. Donate a gift to a child in need.

17. Make some decorations or color some holiday pictures to bring to an assisted living or nursing home.

18. Learn a new Christmas song.

19. Find out how Christmas is celebrated in another country.

20. Pack a lunch or two and give it to homeless people you pass on the street.

21. Ring the bell for the Salvation Army.

22. Visit a local animal shelter and spend some time playing with the animals.

23. Fill a stocking with a piece of candy or small toy for each child.

24. Do something nice for someone without telling them.

25. Make a paper chain to decorate your home.

26. String some pop corn and hang it on a tree for the birds.

Be sure to include your own ideas that work for your family, faith, and are age-appropriate for your kids. Most importantly, create a tradition that celebrates the real reason for the season.

Each day, we will share instructions and ideas for the activities listed above and sites you can visit for information on other activities on the list.

We hope this will help you create or add traditions to your families holidays.

Does Size Really Matter?

2010-11-04T12:18:00.000-07:00

What do you say when your 9 year old daughter wants to play basketball? In our house, our mouths say, “Go for it!” but our hearts say, “Don’t you want to try something else?” Of all the sports she wants to try, basketball is definitely not the first sport we’d encourage her to try.

Let’s just say our daughter is no Lebron James or Yao Min when it comes to stature. She just reaches three and a half feet tall and the scale barely tips at 47 pounds. For those of you who don’t know how big a 4^th typical fourth grader is, let’s just say she is on the extreme petite side.

She’s always been small, but her personality, self perception and voice have always been huge and made her seem larger than life. Ever since she was a little girl she has been perceived by others to be several years younger than her chronological age and have treated her as such. This has been a source of many tears for her and heartache for us. Through all of this though, she has never doubted her abilities; but at times, we have and this is one of those times.

Over the years we have encouraged her to try dance, gymnastics, swimming, golf, musical instruments and tae kwon do; all activities where size doesn’t matter. She didn’t really take to any of them, but we had her continue tae kwon do for exercise, socialization and it was something she could do year round. As a parent, I would say she doesn’t put a lot of effort into her practice and it’s frustrating because I see dollar signs being wasted every time she works out.

So, when she said she wanted to take up basketball because she wanted to play basketball with the boys at recess, we considered her size and her lack of effort in other activities and we said, “Okay”. Yes, we said, “okay” and then for the next two months we began worrying how her self-esteem would be damaged from this experience and how it would be another waste of money. To provide her with a little head start, we enlisted our older children to play basketball with her at the neighbor’s hoop before she started on her new team.

Last night was her first practice. When I walked into the carpeted gym and saw the hoops hanging 9 feet off the ground and her teammates who were six to twelve inches taller than my daughter, my heart sank. She didn’t know any of these girls but, in her usual bigger-than-life style, she trotted over, basketball under her arm, to meet her new coach and teammates.

The practice started with running, high knees and sliding. So far, so good, from my point of view. In fact, she was more coordinated and some of the girls. Next, dribbling and passing. Her dribbling could use some work but her passing wasn’t too bad. Whew! Now it was time to shoot some baskets into the hoops hovering nine feet in the air. First shot…she made it! Not one, not two, but lots of shots! She could actually shoot the ball high enough to make a basket. I started to watch her more intently and I could see muscles that I never realized she had. One of the coaches even asked me if she was also a gymnast because she was so strong. I told him, “No, she does tae kwon do.” That was it! Although she appeared to be lackadaisical in her tae kwon do classes, she had been building strength, endurance and coordination I never knew she had!

After practice I told my daughter about my previous concerns and how proud I was of her effort, coordination and how strength. Her face beamed with a smile that reached from ear to ear and her little chest puffed out in pride. She never doubted herself or her abilities despite her small size. But I did.

My daughter taught me more about her in one hour than I could have learned in a week. I am so proud of her and I will never underestimate her abilities again. She taught me that it isn’t about size, but all about heart.

2010-08-24T07:12:00.001-07:00

I've never been one to hide nutritional nuggets in my kids' food to improve their dietary intake ...until now.

Our nine year old daughter is very small for her size and is often asked if she is in kindergarten or first grade. Now, I'm no giant, but it's clear she is quite small and her height is a very sensitive subject with her. We have visited an endocrinologist, been through growth hormone testing and tried drinking milkshakes with every meal. So far, we've discovered that she does not have a growth hormone deficiency and that she really doesn't like milkshakes as much as I do. And, although we let her eat whenever and whatever she wants, as prescribed by her doctor, my husband and I decided to limit the sweet intake and try to get her to eat better. After six years, I think we're finally getting somewhere and it didn't take me hiding fruits and vegetables in her food.

I'm a firm believer in children knowing what they eat, what it's called and what it looks like. But now, I've broken my rule and have been hiding tofu in many of our family meals unbeknownst to my entire family. I've made tofu/fruit smoothies, added it to fried rice, sprinkled it in pasta sauce and any other way I can disguise it. The funny thing is, my family has been raving about my cooking lately! So why should I continue to keep this a secret? Why shouldn't I? My daughter is getting some needed lean proteins which I hope will benefit her medically, and my family is also eating healthier. Isn't that what a mom is supposed to do?

We will continue to monitor our daughter's growth and we'll see if the tofu makes a difference. Will I disguise other foods? Probably not because she has a pretty good intake of fruits and vegetables already.

Back-to-School Letters

2010-08-16T11:45:00.000-07:00

My kids start school on Wednesday; a day we all look forward to after the first blissful week of summer vacation is over. It's not that we don't like being around each other, we all just love structure in our day even if it includes scheduled lazy time. It's just our personalities and we function better with a routine.

Now that the day is fast approaching and we've done the school shopping, the kids know who their teachers are going to be, we've decided what breakfast will be on the first day there's still one thing I like to do at the beginning of each school year...write a letter.

Because we moved so much when our children were young, it seemed as if they were in a new school every year so I began the tradition of writing a letter to their teacher on the first day of school. Now I know most of the teachers probably didn't even read the letter because they thought I was a pushy parent or they wanted to make their own assessment of my child, and I was okay with either reason. Since I had been a teacher for many years, I made certain that the letter was not pushy or caused the teacher to think that I had an agenda. However, the most interesting thing about the letter was that writing the words allowed me to get a clearer look at each of my children and their year-to-year accomplishments. It also turned out to be a wonderful way to see how each of my children grew each year and how our lives changed with new additions to the family, moves, and every day life.

Teachers do not expect, and may not even want, a letter from you on the first day of school. But, if done correctly, you will find the simple act of writing a letter to be one of the most rewarding acts of parenting.

My letter included paragraphs on the following information:

Welcome back to teacher
Information about where your child fits in the family and their personality
General information about your child's academic abilities (be honest, but don't go overboard)
Hobbies or activities that your child enjoys
Information about my husband and me (jobs, how we could help in or out of the classroom, our belief that the teacher is in charge and our expectations for our children's behavior in the classroom)
Wishes for a successful year and contact information

In the Beginning: Get Well Informed

2009-09-22T13:30:00.000-07:00

It has taken me a long time to write this blog, and I think that's because it hits so close to home. Baby blues and postpartum depression are very real and something every expectant mom should know about before they delivering their baby.

When your baby finally arrives, everyone will be thrilled with the new addition to your family....except you. Don't let this bother you. Most mothers, and fathers, aren't instantly infatuated with their new child. The media has warped our sense of motherhood and the reality of new mothers' connections to their babies. However, it is important for all mothers to be aware of healthy and unhealthy signs of attachment after their child is born.

While researching this topic, I discovered that I actually suffered from baby blues after my first child and postpartum depression after my second child. My doctor gave me medicine after my first delivery but didn't really explain what the medicine was for and I discontinued using it after I "felt better". After delivering my second child, it took me five months and a lot of scary symptoms before I went looking for help. Once I found the help I needed, I finally got my life back to normal. However, until this blog I never knew that the symptoms I was exhibiting were actually signs of postpartum depression. I wish had learned more about this aspect of pregnancy before I delivered my babies.

Below I have listed several websites that have information about baby blues and postpartum depression. Not only is it important for you to review the information, it is important for your husband and a trusted friend to also know the symptoms. Make sure they understand that if you do suffer from baby blues or depression, you may not be able to make good choices about your medical needs to overcome the symptoms. Let them know that if you actually do suffer from BB or PPD that you will rely on them to help you receive the assistance you need from your obstetrician.

I am not a physician but a mom who thinks you ought to know. Hopefully you will never need this information and you will have a healthy mother/child bond. But just in case, you will have a head start on the knowledge you need to understand baby blues and postpartum depression.

www.womenshealth.gov/faq/depression-pregnancy.cfm

www.mayoclinic.com/health/postpartum-depression/DS00546

www.emedicinehealth.com/postpartum_depression/page2_em.htm

In the Beginning: Get Well Informed

2009-09-09T11:50:00.000-07:00

The baby industry runs a close second to the wedding industry when it comes to over indulgence. Moms-to-be walk into a baby store and are inundated with all of these tiny, adorable "things"; most of which are absolutely useless but, what does and expectant mom know? The the clerk wants you to register and that product gun is so much fun and so easy to use. While the very hormonal and emotion driven mother walks around the store, she adds a "few" things to her cart. Does this sound familiar?

Luckily, when my first child was born they didn't have the product guns to register but I still made a huge dent in the store. Why did I buy all of this stuff? Because the books said I would need it and, I thought it was all so cute. I wish someone had told me that I didn't need it all, and certainly not all at once. My husband and I bought 10 pacifiers for $20 because the book said to buy five and we were worried we might loose some. Our babies NEVER took a pacifier! That's not the only thing we over purchased on but I'm too embarrassed to talk about the others.

So what are expectant mothers to do? Begin by talking to experienced moms and find out what the basic necessities are. During the first month or two your baby will not need much of anything out of the ordinary. Ask moms for suggestions on items they wished they had known about before their baby was born. Ask about products you should use that make parenting easier, for instance Sheet Savers. (This wonderful product lays over the crib sheet and ties on the posts so you don't have to take the whole crib apart to change the fitted sheet.) You can also email me and request my list of basic recommended products (www.mymomsupport.com).

All moms want what's best for our babies and it's hard to resist the cute baby items. But before you buy, get well informed about what your baby really needs.

In the Beginning: Get Well Informed

2009-08-18T12:23:00.000-07:00

When I was pregnant with my first child, I had absolutely no experience with a baby. In fact, I had never even held a baby. Needless to say, I knew even less about being pregnant. Sure I read the popular book about expecting a baby but I must not have read it cover to cover because I was very poorly informed about the actual labor, delivery and postpartum experiences.

Even though every birthing experience is different for every woman and every child born, it's helpful to know what to expect from the labor, delivery and postpartum. Understanding accurate information about what you body will be going through before, during and after having your baby is key. Most importantly, you have to listen to the information with the understanding that your delivery may be different but there are commonalities in most births.

So, what do you really need to know? First, find a friend, relative or physician that you feel comfortable talking to about the details the books don't tell you. Then start asking questions.

The answers may scare you or confound you but most importantly, they should inform you. Discuss what you hear with your husband or doctor so that when it comes time for your baby's birth you are well informed and well prepared.

In the Beginning: Find Help

2009-08-12T11:15:00.000-07:00

While discussing Momtourage with a friend the other day, she relayed the following story to me and I want to share it with you.

She noticed her new neighbor, who was also a new mom, seemed to always have a baby sitter at the house during the day while she went out. My friend assumed that this new mom wasn't ready to take on motherhood and continued to live her pre-baby lifestyle. At a bible study they both attend, my friend inquired as to whether this new mom was working and that is why she had so many babysitters. Instead, the new mom looked at her, with tears in her eyes, and said, "My husband works so much and travels all of the time and I don't have a network of friends yet, it's the only thing I can do to keep my sanity." At that, my friend was heartbroken that she had thought the worst when really all this new mom needed was someone to talk to or watch the baby for a little bit.

This is such a familiar story for new moms but, this woman at least helped herself by hiring someone who could help her. When you don't have an established network or relatives who can help you with your children, it's time to pay for some help. Consider what things have become very difficult for you to keep up with and resort to hiring someone to help you. Need to get out, hire a babysitter. The house is a disaster, hire a housekeeper once in a while. It's too hard to get a healthy meal ready for dinner, see how the grocery store can help you. The help is there and you need to find it; whether it's free or paid for.

By the way, those of you without children, think about how you can help a new mom. You never know how you could really be a blessing.

In the Beginning: Find Help

2009-08-04T10:38:00.000-07:00

Mothering is a very rewarding job however, it can also be a very lonely job. Creating a network of people is the best way for expectant moms to find help and support but, not all expectant moms have a network.

When I was eight months pregnant with my first child my husband and I moved to a new location far away from anyone we knew. Luckily his job provided an instant network but, as with any new group of people, it takes time to get to know each other. By the time our baby was born, we had developed a small but great support network.

There are many reasons that expectant moms may not have support networks: they have moved recently, are shy, don't know how to meet people, and others. More importantly there are so many reasons why expectant moms need support networks. Here are just a few ideas of support networks can help you.

Child care: for date night, a night out with your friends, referrals for daycares/preschools, when you have the flu and your husband is traveling (I am speaking from experience)

Playgroups: great way for parents to interact and children to socialize, learn things from other moms, share experiences, provide help in times of need, support

Hobbies: get out of the house and let dad spend time with your baby, focus on something of interest to you, meet new people

Work (even part-time): talk with other adults, use your brain power, meet new people, earn some spending money

Church or other Spiritual House: provide help in times of need or counseling, peace, meet new people, provide classes usually with childcare, support

Expectant moms really don't know what kind of help they will until their baby actually arrives and then they are so busy with their new baby that it is difficult to find or start a network. If you know a new mom, introduce her to a network of people who could support her. Or, if you are expecting, it's time to start building your support network now. You may have to step outside of your comfort zone but every mom needs all of the support she can get.

In the Beginning: Find Help

2009-07-29T09:52:00.000-07:00

Now that you are more inclined to seek out help, let's find another avenue for help.

Food and meal preparation seem to rank right up there as something we know is important and really need but, forget to find a way to make it easier. I've already blogged about how eating healthy during your pregnancy is important to the baby and your body but it also helps increase your energy. Now it's time to talk about how to make grocery shopping and meal preparation easier.

Call your local grocer and ask if they have home delivery or pick up capabilities. There is usually a small charge for this service but you can select your items on-line at your convenience. If you are very particular about your groceries, this may not be ideal for you. However, it can be incredibly helpful to someone who is bedridden or just doesn't feel up to a grocery trip. The difference between home delivery and pick up is very small. Home delivery brings your order directly to your home and most of the time delivers it right to your kitchen. A pick up order means that your groceries will be selected and bagged but you pick them up at the grocery store. Most major drug stores also have online shopping services available and the items are delivered to you through the postal system.

Food preparation assistance may also be needed especially if you are experiencing smell sensitivity, are bedridden or just too pregnant to move around. Begin preparing meals that can be stored in the freezer when you are still feeling comfortable to move around. When you prepare a daily meal, make twice as much and put the extra portion in the freezer. Invite friends over to help you prepare several meals for the freezer or have a baby shower and the gifts are meals you can place right in your freezer. (You will want to bring some coolers filled with ice to that shower.) There are many recipes online and cookbooks that can help you prepare meals for the freezer it's just a matter of looking for them.

Buy your grocery stores homemade meals that just need to be warmed up or from the salad bar. There are also business who create homemade meals for the freezer. Some of these businesses are owned by former restaurant chefs who want to work from home. Many of them also provide meals for special dietary needs. See what's available near you.

When you bring your little one home from the hospital you will want to continue eating healthy but it may not be so easy. Take some time now to discover how to make it easier for you and remember to ask others for help.

In the Beginning: Find Help

2009-07-28T14:19:00.001-07:00

Asking for help is not an easy thing to do for most women and too many women feel societal pressure to be a Supermom. By the way, who came up with that term anyway?

For hundreds and thousands of years, women had a multigenerational support network when it came to raising their children. There were times when women rested for 30 days, had their feet rubbed with oil and allowed other women to help care for their baby after giving birth. I seem to have missed that era and my feet were certainly not rubbed with oil after I gave birth! Now days we are such a transient population that many women don't even live within driving distance of their relatives and most likely don't have a big support network where they live. What happened to supporting mothers and how do we get it back? We need to begin to ask for help and willingly give help and now is the time to start.

Let's start by asking your spouse for help. Most husbands want to help now that you are pregnant but they just don't know what to do. You need to be very clear in the type of help you want from your husband---he is not a mindreader. Start by discussing specific ways in which he can help you; doing the laundry, running some extra errands, allowing you time to nap, etc. The most important thing you must remember when you ask him for help is that you are not the gatekeeper. He will do tasks differently than you and you have to be okay with that. If you begin to criticize the way he is helping you, you will lose his willingness to support you. On the other hand, if he doesn't know how to do something such as the laundry, post a simple sheet of directions in the laundry room that he can refer to. Finally, remember to tell him that you appreciate his help.

Asking for help is really not that difficult; it's all in the way you do it. Begin changing the Supermom mentality today.

In the Beginning: Why?

2009-07-27T08:52:00.000-07:00

Are you wondering why I wrote the previous blogs? You're pregnant and feeling joyous at the upcoming birth of your child which is exactly what you are supposed to be doing. But, it is also important to take care of yourself during your pregnancy. Mothering is an incredibly stressful and demanding career but as the old saying goes, "when Mom's happy, everyone's happy". For your child to feel joy and happiness, it is important for you to feel good about, and take care of yourself starting right now.

When I was pregnant, I had absolutely no idea what pregnancy and having a child entailed. My support group was limited because I was the first of my friends to have a baby and they knew about as much as I did...NOTHING. Of course I read all of the books and did everything I could to take care of my baby but did nothing to take care of myself. No one really told me how important that would be in raising my children. Looking back, I would have done many things very differently. I know it would have made a difference in my physical and mental well-being after my baby was born.

So now, why did I write this blog? Because I want you to begin looking for people to support you in a variety of ways and I want you to take care of yourself from the inside out. Don't be afraid to ask for and accept help. It doesn't make you need or helpless, it makes you healthy. Another reason for writing this blog was for people who know moms-to-be. Take time to support a pregnant friend or family member by doing something simple to ease their daily stress. We all know pregnant women get lots of advice but what they really need is loving, hands-on support that benefits their daily life.

I'm off to call my pregnant friend to see if I can watch her oldest child while she gets some needed rest. What can you do?

Next in the series: In the Beginning: Find Help

In the Beginning: Sleep

2009-07-24T16:28:00.000-07:00

Once your child is born, sleep will become a luxury. I'm not suggesting that you start making up for the sleep you will loose when your little one arrives but, you need to start listening to your body now.

Begin your sleep routine early in your pregnancy by setting a regular bedtime and get up at the same time each day. As your pregnancy progresses, you need to be aware that your body will need more restful time. Give your body what it needs and adjust your sleep times as needed.

Towards the end of your pregnancy you will be getting up several times during the night to use the bathroom and, you will loose the restful sleep you have been used to before you were pregnant. Because you are not sleeping well, it's important to take time during the day to rest or sleep. Your body is preparing itself for labor.

If you are pregnant and have children, find someone to watch your children while you take some time to rest during the day. If you know a pregnant woman who has children, offer to watch her children while she sleeps. Be ready to insist if she says no.

Those of you who are pregnant for the first time, enjoy this time to sleep. You will never sleep the same after your child is born.

In the Beginning: Food

2009-07-23T11:59:00.001-07:00

Now that I'm back from vacation and have Internet access, I'm ready to blog again.

I have been blogging on the theme of "Teach Your Children Well" which starts with you. By setting a good example for your children you will not only improve your health and wellness but also your child's.

Food is a big part of pregnancy. Moms enjoy sharing their pregnancy cravings, some women think they can eat anything and as much as they want because they are pregnant, morning sickness can effect your eating and the extra weight can be difficult to lose after your baby is born. Food is a very important topic to discuss with your physician and something women should think about and create a plan for during their pregnancy.

I am petite woman with a very fast metabolism and when I was pregnant with my first child I didn't think about what I ate. I had severe morning sickness and carried crackers or baby cookies in coat pockets, my purse, in the car, etc. Once the morning sickness subsided, the eating frenzy began! My husband likes to tell the story of how I ate an Arby's meal on the way home from work then polished off 1/2 of a large pizza. Funny yes, healthy no! During this pregnancy, I gained over 40 pounds. On a person of my height, I looked like I had a swallowed more than a few basketballs.

Looking back on all of my pregnancies, I wished I had devised a plan for how I ate during the nine months. Eating healthier during my pregnancies would have given me more energy, I would have had less back pain from the extra unnecessary weight, and would have had less difficulty losing my baby weight. Seeking support from my husband would also have helped my eating habits. Since I didn't have an eating plan my husband went right along with me, allowing me to eating whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, as much as I wanted. I'm sure my hormones would have caused me to scream at him if he suggested I eat fruit instead of a huge bowl of ice cream but, if I had a plan, his support would have been easier to accept.

As a mom-to-be, take some time to think through your food choices for you and your baby during your pregnancy. Find a few people to be your support network and let them know about your plan. If you know a pregnant woman, support her by bringing her some cut up fruit or a healthy dinner. Even making your own healthy choices when you are eating with a mom-to-be can be a healthy way to support her.

Your plan doesn't have to be formal or written and it should allow for flexibility. Create a support network and inform them of your plan and how you would like them to help you. Eating well is good for you and good for your baby.

In the Beginning: Exercise

2009-07-15T08:21:00.000-07:00

Most women dread this word whether they are pregnant or not. Exercise. We always find some excuse as to why we can't exercise; I'm too tired, I don't have any exercise clothes, I don't have time, I don't like to exercise and the list goes on. I'm sure I've used all of the excuses to get out of exercising.

Now that you are pregnant, it's a good time to put all of those excuses behind you and start an exercise routine. Exercise doesn't have to be difficult or take a long but most of all it has to be fun. Ten minutes a day is a good place to start. Try putting on your favorite music and dance around the house, take a walk with a friend or your husband, spend some time stretching, or window shopping in the mall. Even magazines have ideas for simple exercises you can do in ten minutes or less.

We all know the benefits of exercise for yourself and your unborn child. You will be happy that you took only ten minutes out of your day to energize yourself and improve the health of your child.

In The Beginning: Slow Down

2009-07-14T08:50:00.000-07:00

Pregnancies vary for all women. Some women have smooth, uneventful pregnancies and others have difficult ones. No matter which type of pregnancy you have, it's time to slow down from the very beginning. Your life will never be the same after you have your baby whether it is your first child or your fifth.

When I Googled "slow down during pregnancy" I received several hits; slow down weight gain, your hormones slow down, baby's bowel movements slow down, slow down at the end of your pregnancy. There was absolutely nothing on slowing down and smelling the roses during your entire pregnancy.

Here are things I could have slowed down on when I was pregnant.

Work

My career as a teacher was very fulfilling and gratifying and I enjoyed watching my students learn. However, because I am so right brained, I spent hours and hours creating intricate ways to display my students work, making every worksheet and note home "cute" with just the right clip art and headings. I also lacked a sound organizational plan which caused extra hours of work just to get organized. Looking back I could have performed my job with the precision it needed by sticking with the basics and making an organizational plan and sticking to it.

Trying To Be Perfect

None of my pregnancies were particularly easy and nine months seems like an eternity when you are sick most of the time. In addition to working too much I spent too much time worrying about being the perfect mother and appearing as if I had everything together in my life. Looking back I wish I had slowed down enough to enjoy the moments with my husband and children before each new baby arrived. Our lives are never the same after a new baby joins the clan.

Guilt

I have a real knack for feeling guilty. When I was tired from my pregnancy or from being up all night with a child, I felt guilty for taking time to rest or nap. I felt I had to do this or that or read, color and take my kids to the playground all at once. Looking back I wished I had slowed down and taken time for myself. Yes, it sometimes seems like a guilty pleasure but, in caring for ourselves, we show our children the importance of taking care of our body and it creates healthier relationships with our family.

Now that my family is complete, I wish I had those times back to enjoy. But because of these life lessons, I have become a better mother and find little ways to help other mothers enjoy their pregnancy. What can you share with a mom-to-be that helps her slow down and enjoy each moment before her baby arrives?

Teach Our Children Well: In the Beginning

2009-07-13T09:17:00.001-07:00

The beginning of being a mother starts the moment you become pregnant. As an expectant mom your immediate thoughts are that you want to take care of your child to ensure that your baby is healthy and happy. But did you know that it all begins with taking care of youself?

When I was pregnant with my first child, I read about how important it was to rest, eat healthy, and exercise however, I really didn't take it to heart and I didn't have a network of other women to encourage me to change my lifestyle. I had always been petite, loved to eat and always had too much to do to be able to rest or exercise. Unfortunately, it all took a toll on me. I gained a lot of weight, went back to work too soon, and was constantly stressed and exhausted. It took me years to recover from the exhaustion, anxiety and constant struggle to keep up as a mother and wife. Worst of all, I didn't take the time to enjoy my daughter's infancy stage and felt like a complete failure as a mother.

Somehow, when we become a mother, we begin to think of ourselves last when really we need to put ourselves first. So let's start at the very beginning; the first step in becoming a happy and healthy mom...Simplify!

Even if you are in your first trimester, begin to simplify your life right now. For some women this could mean putting off the housework, not taking on anymore activities, bringing less work home from the office, taking a walk outside as opposed to going to the noisy gym, or just decluttering a room. Another way many moms-to-be get overwhelmed is by searching for information about babies in books and on the internet. Simplify this process by finding one baby book or website

that works for you. Babycenter.com is one of my favorites for comprehensive and quality information. Once you register (it's free), they automatically email you information that is relevant only to the stage you are at in your pregnancy.

Start simplifying today by creating a list of things that seem to be causing you stress. Choose one thing from that list to simplifying and practice it for a week or two so that it is ingrained in your daily life. Then select another task to simplify and begin to practice it. By the time your baby arrives you will have taken steps to simplify your life so that you can enjoy your beautiful, new baby.

Teach Our Children Well

2009-07-13T09:02:00.000-07:00

I have decided to change the way I blog. Instead of selecting random topics to blog about, I am going deeply focus on raising our children through multiple postings. The overall theme of the blogs will be "Teach Our Children Well" and will discuss topics on raising our children from before they are born/infancy, to the toddler years, preschool and into the elementary school years. Even though there will be a new posting everyday, this endeavor will take many weeks and even months to complete. I hope that you will add your comments, thoughts and suggestions to the blog that can be shared with other mothers.

Everything we do and say as parents sets an example for our children and molds them into the adult they will become. And although you may be past the stage I am blogging about, take the time to read the post and pass the information on to a mother you know who may be struggling at this stage. Mothers do not need to mother alone. We need to support and encourage one another every step of the way. Every mother needs a Momtourage.

Getting Rid of the Junk Mail

2009-06-01T13:04:00.000-07:00

After being on vacation for 10 days with my family there were two things I dreaded when I returned home; laundry and mail. I knew the laundry could wait, but as with many previous experiences a large USPS bin would be on my porch overflowing with mail when we returned from vacation. Hopefully, changes I made before we left would alleviate the mass of junk mail that overwhelmed our small pile of regular mail when we arrived home.

Several months before we left, I made a decision to cut down on the amount of junk mail we received. I considered this decision as my little part for saving the earth but more importantly, this decision was about saving my time and being more organized. As with any organization project, it took some time on the front end to save me a lot of time on the back end but it was worth the effort.

During the first week of my new project, I tore off the covers of all of the catalogs I received and wrote the customer number, if I had one, in the bottom corner. I also took all of the junk mail out of their envelopes and kept only the cover letter. The catalog covers and cover letters from the week were kept in a pile on my desk. At the end of the week I sat down at my computer and began to take my name off all of the distribution lists for the catalogs and junk mail. I started by writing a short note requesting to be removed from the mail and email distribution lists, including my address, email address and customer number if available. I copied the note then went to the websites for each piece in my pile, found the "unsubscribe" or "contact us" tab and pasted my note in the appropriate box. When I had finished this process for each piece, I recycled the cover letters and placed the catalog covers in a binder so I could have a record of the catalogs I use.

This whole process took me about an hour for 34 pieces of junk mail. The next day, I received 34 emails (which took some time to remove) that told me the company had received my email and would discontinue contacting me . Each week meant I had some new sites to contact but the number of these sites rapidly dwindled over the next few months. All in all, the whole process took about 3 hours to contact over 70 sites.

So, after ten days away from home, I went to the post office to pick up my mail. Instead of bringing me a large postal bin, the postal employee brought me only an arm load of mail. And all of the mail was relevant except for seven pieces of junk mail!

The time I spent at the beginning of this project was well worth the time I am saving now.

Grocery Game Update

2009-04-29T09:29:00.000-07:00

It's been almost five months since I began playing the Grocery Game and it's time for an update...

Just some quick background information... I have a family of 5, shop weekly at two large grocery stores and two national drug stores and pay $25 a month for the service. I am careful to strictly follow my list and don't make many impulse purchases. This program includes savings on produce, meat, cleaning products, health and beauty, as well as national brands. And, it is not just prepackaged food. Dinner planning has become much easier because I have so much to choose from and don't have to make last minute runs to the store. My kids also like that they have fun snacks to serve their friends when they come over.

Here's what's happened for my family.

The first 4 weeks were a little time consuming because I was learning how to use the Grocery Game and catching up on clipping coupons. I would spend two hours looking at the sale lists online, selecting the products, printing the lists, and finding coupons. (I only use the coupons found in the newspaper and do not clip coupons online.) Since stockpiling items is part of successfully playing the Grocery Game, it took me longer initially because my lists for the stores I visit were much longer which caused me to spend more time in the stores. But checking out is where the payoff (literally) began!

The site said that at 12 weeks I would be on the same coupon clipping schedule as the Grocery Game and shopping trips would be easier. They were right on. At 12 weeks, the length of my shopping lists fell dramatically and I had stockpiled so much food that I didn't need to buy as much each week. Also, because the stores in my area are close together, I can now go to four stores and shop for my groceries in one hour; thereby drastically cutting down the time that I spend in the stores. Not only that, I spend, on average, $100 a week for groceries and I have more food than ever! Last week I bought 46 items and only spent $89. The purchase included four packages of chicken breasts and several items that weren't even on sale. I also saved $44 on that trip! I have estimated that the savings is similar to receiving a $3-4,000 raise during the year. But, my favorite part is when I lock up the register at one store because I save so much money.

One drawback is that we may not always have the exact product that everyone likes but it gives us a chance to try new things. Before the Grocery Game, even though we spent a lot of money on food, there seemed to be very little of it. My kids would eat more often because the treats would be eaten first and they wanted to be sure to get some before it disappeared. Now, having this much food in the house prevents my children from over snacking and they make better choices. Who would have thought?

I have looked at other grocery saving websites but find this one the easiest and least time consuming to use. Now, every time I save money my kids ask me if I'm playing the Grocery Game. To try the Grocery Game visit www.grocerygame.com.

It's What's On The Inside That Matters

2009-04-28T19:07:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I wrote about the wonderful lesson to be learned by watching Susan Boyle's performance on Britain's Got Talent however, how do we teach younger children to look for the inner beauty in others? The following example is how I taught my classroom students the importance of looking beyond appearance to discover people's real gifts.

First, select two boxes that are the same size. Fill one box with some candy or treats and the other box with rocks. When you shake the boxes, the sounds should be about the same. Next, take a brown paper bag, crumble it, spill things on it and make it as messy as possible. Wrap the box of candy with this paper. Then, take some pretty wrapping paper, ribbon and bows and wrap the box of rocks. Once both boxes are wrapped, show them to your child and ask him which gift he would like to open and why. Most children will select the beautifully wrapped box thinking that there must be something really special in there. After they have opened it and find the rocks, let them open the messy package and find the candy. Now is the perfect time to start a conversation on the importance of inner beauty.

This is a simple lesson that will have an impact your child and teach the virtues of compassion and respect that will last a lifetime.

A Simple Lesson From a Simple Woman

2009-04-27T09:19:00.000-07:00

I have been wanting to write about Susan Boyle ever since she became a worldwide sensation a few weeks ago. She has made a tremendous impact on my life and she doesn't even know it. Who is Susan Boyle and why has she made such an impact, you ask? Susan Boyle was the contestant on Britain's Got Talent who was heckled by the audience when she walked out on stage to sing in this talent competition. I admit, I was very skeptical that she could sing at all just by looking at her dowdy appearance. However, being a mom who abhors teasing, I was appalled by the audiences reaction to her as she took the stage. When Simon Cowell asked her what she was going to sing (I Dreamed a Dream, from Les Mis) and what singer she wanted to be compared to (Elaine Page), my heart began to sink for this underdog. I was sure she was going to be the William Hung of Britain and I certainly didn't want that to happen to the seemingly sweet and unassuming woman. Then, the music began, a hush fell over the audience and I held my breath. The song that came forth was absolutely incredible and brought the audience to their feet in a roar of applause. I didn't even know this woman, but my heart began to fill with joy for her and my eyes filled with tears for this amazing lesson she taught us.

Now Susan Boyle is known by millions, but I stop and think how many Susan Boyles do I come in contact with every day. This simple Scottish woman has reminded me that everyone has a gift and it doesn't matter how the gift is wrapped, just that we need to look inside the package to find the real beauty. A simple lesson, by a simple woman; how much more simple can it get?

Your Child's First Teacher

2009-04-08T12:17:00.000-07:00

We know that we are our child's first teacher, but understanding the long term impact of our teaching won't be seen until our children are grown. The most important idea that we need to keep in mind is how we can be an effective teacher to our children.

My friend is a business coach who works with owners, executives and managers assisting them in strengthening their leadership skills. Last week he wrote a blog about becoming a better leader and teacher in the business world. As I read his blog I compared it to the skills we need as parents and teachers to our children. Teaching children effectively now will provide them with the skills they need to become effective leaders and teachers in the future.

I encourage you to read his blog at http://uncommonsenseforleaders.blogspot.com.

Creativity at Work

2009-04-01T12:06:00.000-07:00

I started my creative embroidery project and it started a flurry of creativity in the house. My two daughters, ages 13 and 7, have begun their own projects. My oldest daughter decided that she wanted me to embroider shirts for her and her best friend. Although I didn't want this to be screen related creativity, she found a really cute clip art that she wanted to use for the shirts. Once that was complete, she began to make a friendship bracelet from the multitude of embroidery floss laying about. My youngest daughter wanted to try her hand at embroidering also. Because I thought ahead, I gave her a piece of burlap, an embroidery hoop, a large needle and access to all of the floss. She thought she was really grown up. I was just going to let her make stitches but she surprised me with stitching a castle out of purple thread. Then she put orange and pink together and started to stitch a sunset. Next she moved on to the grass. She was so proud of her work that she brought it to class for sharing. Some of the boys even asked her to let them take a turn stitching. She was so proud.

While all of us girls were working away in the family room, my son (11) decided to join us. His creative specialty is creative writing and drawing. He sat with us and asked if I would stitch a pillow for him of a golf course hole he designed. Quickly he grabbed a piece of paper and pencil and started in on his drawing.

It has been a long time since we all sat in one room, without the TV or computer on, talking, laughing and sharing what we were doing. One small step for mom, one giant leap for the Mott Family.

Fostering Creativity in Children

2009-03-30T11:14:00.000-07:00

A friend of mine is working on a presentation for her preschool about fostering creativity in children and I told her I would look into the topic to see what I could find that might help her. I thought I was fairly knowledgeable about about creativity since creativity is a high priority in our house. But a little internet searching led me to a fabulous book that I never expected to find. The book is The Creative Family by Amanda Blake Soule and it brought back wonderful childhood memories of exploration, imagination and discovery. Remember staying outside all day long, making forts, playing games and watching the clouds? Reading this book reminded that creativity is not just art projects; it's walking in nature, making up stories, creating original gifts, and much, much more. This book provided so many simple ideas for our electronic obsessed children that I could hardly decide where to begin. I decided to set an example by doing something creative myself. The project I chose involves taking one of my children's drawings of her and her friend and embroidering it onto a piece of fabric. Then I'm going to sew it onto a t-shirt to send to her friend who lives 1500 miles away. Hopefully it will turn out as cute as I'm imagining. But really, that's not the idea. The idea is for my children to see me being creative and encouraging them to try a new creative outlet rather than sitting in front of a screen. I hope it works!

The Best Christmas Ever

2008-12-27T15:13:00.000-08:00

For the past three days, all I have been saying is that this was the best Christmas I had ever had. Not only am I saying this but so are my husband and my three kids! This got me thinking about why this Christmas was so different than any other Christmas I have celebrated.

I tend to be a little stressed when it comes to the holiday season and decide that everything has to be perfect, or better, than the year before. I have no idea where this thought process came from but I'm sure my husband has a few ideas... This year, for some reason, I didn't have any desire to create a celebration that would top the year before. My only desire was to enjoy the holidays.

Usually, I am the only one who decorates and prepares for the holidays but, this year I insisted everyone pitch in which meant that I had to release some control on how things were done. Only a few lights went up and half of them didn't work but that didn't seem to matter. My mom helped put up some of my holiday decorations and it went so much faster with an extra set of hands. My gift list was ready to go and my shopping, wrapping and mailing was done by early December. I baked several batches of cookies while my kids helped or entertained themselves without arguing. On Christmas Eve Day, we all worked together to prepare the food for that night and we had a great time together! Christmas Eve was spent together, just the five of us, enjoying Christmas service, laughing and just being together.

The kids hadn't been this excited about a visit from Santa in years and I think the fact that they helped in the preparations helped create this excitement. Christmas Day was filled with relaxation, more time enjoying each other, and playing with new toys. As the day wore on I had planned to cook a wonderful dinner for my family. Instead, we ended up going out for Chinese food just like the family in "The Christmas Story". After that, we drove around for a couple of hours and looked at the Christmas lights.

I never imagined that Christmas could be so enjoyable and even a little untraditional. But I think that the help I received from my family throughout the season eased the stress I always feel and everyone was so proud of the little things they did to help. I still didn't get my Christmas cards out on time this year...maybe next year.

Oeir reaction when they opened

Tightening the Grocery Belt

2008-12-09T12:06:00.001-08:00

It has been a long time since I last posted and, like everyone else, my life has turned busy during this holiday time. However, yesterday I discovered a new way to grocery shop and had to share it with you. But before you go on, this blog may not be for everyone. If you don't like a little challenge, a few constraints and a little extra work when it comes to grocery shopping, then you might want to stop reading right now.

Earlier this month I was reading a local parenting magazine and came across an article about "The Grocery Game". In short, a woman has turned her hobby of clipping coupons and saving money at the grocery store into an online business. The idea of the business is to join for $10 a month and you can receive a list of specials at your local grocery store, which coupons to clip, where to find the coupons and the best products to stock up on. I am incredibly skeptical when it comes to programs like these so I wasn't going to jump on board right away. I know that I don't like to work hard when it comes to grocery shopping and I didn't believe I was going to make up the $10 from the membership fee. However, the business I am in made me reconsider trying this grocery game once or twice.

Yesterday, I signed up for the trial membership which is $1 for four weeks of grocery lists to as many of your local stores as you wished. I decided to get my money's worth and signed up for two grocery stores and two nationwide drugstores. I received four lists of published and non-published sale items for each store. It took me a little while to understand the color coding on the lists, coupon shorthand and to print the lists. Since this was my first time playing the game, I spent about two hours studying the lists, deciding what I was going to buy and finding and clipping some of the matching coupons. Two hours was really more time than I wanted to spend but I wanted to maximize my trial experience.

Today was shopping day! I decided to shop at the four stores I selected and also visit a small discount grocer that I like. It seemed like a daunting task to have five shopping lists, coupons for each store and yet not spend all day doing my grocery shopping. Believe it or not, I actually made it through all five stores in less than two hours and made it home with at least 10% more groceries than I usually purchase. That being said, I couldn't wait to see how much money I had really saved; ever the skeptic.

As I reviewed the grocery receipts, I made a mental note that I had purchase a few items that were not on "The Grocery Game's" list but that I still needed. I also considered that the most I had ever saved on a weeks worth of groceries using sales and coupons was about $25. Anxiously I added the five receipts together and calculated that I had spent $208.96. Not bad for a week of groceries which included 10% more items that usual. Next came the real truth...how much did I actually save? Remember, the savings amount included purchasing advertised items listed on "The Grocery Game" and coupons. My grand total savings from the five stores was $99.65! I was absolutely astonished. Had I not played the game and purchased the same items, I would have spent $308.61! I still can't believe it and, the food I bought was food we normally eat, not a lot of junk food and included meats, fruits and vegetables. Saving 32% on my grocery bill made me incredibly excited and even giddy.

Like I said before, this isn't for everyone and it may not be a long term game for me. The game encourages buying multiple food items when it is inexpensive (which may eventually become difficult when I run out of storage space), shopping every week (which may or may not happen), and remembering that you should only buy what your family will use. They also said that you will need to play the game for a few weeks before you actually begin to see your grocery bill decline.

Even though this whole trial required some extra work, the payoff was well worth it. I'm sure that next week will be less time consuming and I'm already looking forward to see if I can save even more on my next grocery trip! No wonder it's called "The Grocery Game".

Making Men Part of Your Parenting Network

2008-10-09T09:39:00.000-07:00

I have been enjoying several books about mothers, parenting and women's issues to continue gaining knowledge for my business. All of them have been wonderful and all of them have basically the same themes: Mothering is hard and we're not alone in the feelings that we have about mothering. Although I know both of these ideas very well, it's always reassuring to know that other women are feeling the same way about raising children.

Since I began mothering 13 years ago, I have been growing a network of individuals who have supported me and let me know that I am not alone in raising my children. I am incredibly blessed to have a group of men and women on whom I can call upon to help me grow as a mother. Yes, I did say men too. My husband is my greatest asset and strongest supporter in my network. He has a very easy going personality and always thinks before he reacts. I appreciate how much he balances my parenting techniques and he provides me with a new perspective on my children. He constantly thinks of special ways that he can spend time with each of our kids individually or together and he is always eager to help them when they are in need of a listening ear.

There are other men who are friends of mine that I also look to for support. These individuals provide a male point of view on raising children and it is usually very different than a woman's point of view. The main thing I have learned from these men is that it is of utmost importance to spend quality time with your children and don't sweat the small stuff. They remind me that my laundry will be there tomorrow but my children will only be young once. These men set good examples by putting aside their work, phones and other distractions to play and talk with their children on a regular basis. And yes, they are all active participants in the daily household tasks but they desire to build a strong relationship with their kids.

Yesterday, I decided to make more of an effort to follow the lead of these strong men who support me. After my kids get home from school, it is now time for me to put away my work and turn off my computer. I am making a conscience decision to follow the lead of my children and play, listen, read, or snuggle with them. They are only young once and I want to enjoy it while I can. I am grateful for the lessons these men have taught me but most of all, I'm glad that they are part of my parenting network.

With A Little Help From a Friend-or a Stranger

2008-09-29T09:20:00.000-07:00

On Friday, I was picking up a premade dinner at the grocery store around 5:30 pm so that my family could have a meal that resembled something I would have liked to have made from scratch. Many of the people who frequent this particular grocery store around this time of day have just finished a full day of work and are trying to grab some items to put together a meal for their family. Additionally, many of these working men and women are accompanied by their small children who have been just been picked up from daycare. It is an exhausting time of day for everyone.

As the cashier was ringing up my groceries, I noticed a woman three lanes down. She had on her business casual attire and was unloading several items from the bottom of her cart. This may not seem like a difficult task, however she had her sweet toddler asleep on her shoulder. I watched this mother struggle under the weight of the child, trying to use one arm to hold him so his head or body wouldn't shift and awaken him as she emptied the contents at the bottom of her basket. She successfully emptied her basket and her little one never woke up.

I have thought about that woman for the last several days and wondered, why didn't I help her out? Why didn't the people around her help take her groceries out of the cart for her? Although I was three aisles away from her, I could have helped her and dismissed the scornful looks I would have received from the people waiting in line behind me. She didn't have that many things and it would have only taken a few seconds.

After mulling over this situation quite a bit, I have decided to keep it in the forefront of my mind. I have made a commitment to try and reach out in a small way to another mother at least once a day. It could be as simple as a holding the door for a woman with a stroller to watching a friend's child for a few hours so that she can have a break. All mothers need a simple act of kindness once in awhile and maybe the mother we assist will pay it forward and we will start a new trend.

First Steps

2008-09-24T14:35:00.001-07:00

There's a first time for everything. Remember the first time you found out you were pregnant, the first day you brought your baby home or the first time they went to school. These were exciting times in a mom's life; albeit a little frightening too.

Right now I am in the midst of a major first and it has nothing to do with my children accomplishing anything. As a quick side note, I am excited to say that this is my first blog site and I didn't have to have my kids help me navigate through all of the set up! But my personal most exhilarating first, that has taken over my days and nights, is when I started my own business. Now I know that many women/mothers do this everyday but, when it is your own venture into a new world the excitement bubbles up around you.

When I had my first baby thirteen years ago, I had no idea how unprepared I was to raise a child. I was 1500 miles away from family, had just moved into a new city, had no support system in place and my husband and I started new jobs 5 weeks after our daughter was born. I often questioned my choices and I was sure I was the only mother who had such tremendous difficulty raising a child. I never reached out to other mothers for help because I thought I would not be considered a "good" mother. As I had more children and became more involved in preschool, etc., I watched and talked with other mothers and saw that they went through the same issues I did. Over the years, I have enjoyed reaching out to other women for support and in return supporting them. Through these efforts, I have built incredible friendships, raised three fantastic kids and gained a plethora of wisdom along the way. I have learned that strong and diverse support system is an important part of motherhood and that it really does take a village.

So, now I have decided to reach out to the women in my community through my new business. The goal of my business is to bring women together to collaborate on ways to support each other and be good to themselves through the ever changing stages of parenting. My dream for the women who attend the various workshops I offer is for them to feel strong and confident as mothers who will then pay it forward by surrounding other mothers with a supportive network on whom they can rely.

It has taken several years to get build my business but, it all started with a first step. Building and maintaining a strong network takes some time and effort but it, too, starts with a first step. Will you take your first step today?